Christmas after a separation or divorce

Christmas is just days away and not everyone is in the festive mood. There are many reasons that people may find themselves in this predicament but this article focuses on broken couples and families.

Despite Christmas often being associated with family, there are some people who for one reason or the other are fresh from a separation or divorce

In as much as self-pity may find its way to such homes, commentators feel there are certain things that can be done to celebrate Christmas without necessarily engaging in a pity party.

Marriage counselor Constance Masamba feels Christmas does not have to be gloomy. She says there are other ways of brightening up the day and enjoy just like everyone else.

“Christmas can be a tough time after separation, but there are things you can do to make the holidays a little less stressful. The biggest mistake people make is to compare themselves with other families. That is wrong as single parents need to accept the situation and take it one day at a time,” she says.

She suggests that meeting friends and other extended family members helps in getting through tough times and indeed through the season without walloping in loneliness.

Masamba further advices that too much stress can affect the way one operates in their day to day activities.

“Always pat yourself on the back for the things you achieved and where you can improve without blaming yourself. Reflect upon where you are and where you are going in order to lay down a new foundation,” she said.

Psychologist Chiwoza Bandawe says stress can have major effects if the situation is not dealt with on time.

“Stress comes in differently, including loneliness. Usually it is better to hang around with family members or do certain things you like. If you see things are getting worse, visit a psychologist. It can never be too late,” he says.