I have discussed here before about the tendencies by some women to splash money, gifts and general material to men with the attempt to purchase their love and affection. They dangle big wallets and promises of a fairy tale romance of fortune and luxury. Sadly, many fall for this, but the eventualities are not the subject matter today.
I would like to look at a similar scenario, but involving vulnerability instead. I am referring to women desperate to hold on to love or probably being schemed by devious men. These are the type that feed on women’s vulnerability that culminates into desperation.
Recently, a friend told me her boyfriend of three years borrowed money from her. She has been a single mother for years and her two daughters are all grown up and working. She is still young and possibly looking for love and affection. The man in question took the money two months ago after promising to repay her within two weeks of the said month. Weeks have gone by and there is no word from him. She used money meant for her groceries and topped it up with a Village Savings and Loans to meet his need and please him. Now months on, she is struggling to repay the grouping and interests keep rising. She doesn’t know what to do because all he does is promise to repay.
There are many women in similar boats, struggling to repay loans they took for their loved ones. Please, no amount of love displays will make a man reciprocate or stay. If he loves you, he does and if not, well—you cannot force or change his mind. Let us learn to adjust and let go. Desperation is one emotional aspect that leads astray and often leaves many in tears. A caring man will be concerned about your welfare and will not want to hurt you. A careless one will not mind even when you are in trouble. They will not care to get you in trouble and problems.
My friend has apparently been in four different relationships in the past four years. They have all been fiascos. She keeps looking for love and the latest came with marriage promises. He is only waiting to solve a list of issues before he finally commits to her. For her, that all she needed to hear and feels obligated to help him from time to time. Nothing wrong in that, but I think she needs to open her eyes to reality. This is a man who doesn’t support her in any way, but has the guts to ask for her help. He is not staying.
One woman, in desperation to hold on to a lost love also decided to offer money to her husband whose was in the process of filing for divorce. She believed the money would hook him to her. It was all in vain.
Let them go when it doesn’t seem to work. Use that money to re-build your lives or invest in something worthwhile. Love cannot be stopped or bought.