Not long ago, a cousin of mine invited me for a drink at a joint down town Blantyre popularly known as Kwa Baba and the first person who caught my attention that evening was a young attractive lady blessed with sublime dancing skills. On probing, I later learnt her name was Amina.
The alluring sway of her hips as she shook it to the left and then to the right while dancing to the hit song Dorobucci, left me stunned. But upon noticing that I was making advances on her, my cousin had some free advice for me: “Cousy, mutaye ameneyo ndi mpeni, komanso amachotsa zitalizitali [cousin, just ignore her she’s something else and she is expensive].” Who was I not to take advice from a caring cousin?
But then I just couldn’t resist the temptation and hatched a plan to visit the pub on my own two days later. I was left astounded when I found my cousin holding Amina tight and I was forced to make a U-turn instantly. The next day, I bumped into my workmate Kondwani coming out of her room, sweating profusely and your guess is as good as mine on what might have happened. I eventually had my turn three days later.
But that’s how hookers behave, not so? Just like footballers—whoever has the higher stakes or a better wagging tongue, gets them. Cristiano Ronaldo was once quoted as saying there is no better team than Manchester United and he couldn’t imagine playing for another team. Two years later, he was at Santiago Bernabau virtually singing the same jazz.
I, therefore, fail to understand why Big Bullets made a lot of fuss about Victor ‘Vibre’ Limbani joining Silver Strikers. I hear several attempts were made to lure him to stay put in Blantyre, including buying him a plastic bag full of kachewere [irish potato]. But it didn’t work, it was time to start a new lease of life.
Life is good now for Vibre in ‘Elozi’ and gone are the days when he could have soy pieces (Monday), ‘paratroopers’ (beans) (Tuesday), matemba a Domasi (Wednesday), bonya (Thursday) and anjolinjo (Friday). And oh yes, no more roasting dried utaka on a koloboyi.
Let the fella go and blast the good and rosy life and munch pizza at Crossroads. Money talks, the rest walks. a. Glory be to God. Uloliwe..Uloliwe wayidudula hii…Neng’asiza [The train is pushing].