Two years ago I sired a child with my neighour’s wife. I am happily married. So is she. But back then, we were both going through what every marriage goes through: fights.
We met during mphakati prayers and before we knew it, we were in a motel room in town unbuttoning each other’s clothes. A few months later I got the news that every man dreads: She was in the motherly way. We both agreed to keep the news and the baby secret on condition that I continue supporting her financially.
The kid is three years old now and bubbly. I write you because it hurts me so badly when I see him play with my children in my yard. You can actually tell the bond between them that they share the same blood.
However, the child is lacking good care and education because the ‘father’ is not earning as much as I do. Although I send help to the mother of the boy, there is a limit. How can I help the kid?
Should I tell my neighbour that the child he is raising is mine so that I can take over responsibility?
Man on Fire, via e-mail, Lilongwe.
Your neighbour is an idiot. How could he not notice that the young gentlemen he is raising has a head resembling yours? You see, this is the problem these days. Neighbours have little regard of who lives next door.
They do not know the name of the family that shares the street with them or greet each other when they meet at the market. The end result is that neighbours these days hardly recognise each other.
That said, you my dear, please scrutinise and observe your kids and you will be shocked that there are one or two who look ‘strange’; they neither resemble you nor your wife or any other relative. So you may be another idiot!
Life can be funny. When you think you are too clever, you might find that actually it’s you who is raising three kids sired by your neighbhour.
I am saying this because it’s a very common thing women allegedly do these days. So, while you might be smiling from ear-to-ear that you sired a kid with your neighbour’s wife, it’s also very likely that your wife sired one or two kids with a man with ‘better genes’ than yours.
That said, should you tell your neighbour that you have been causing trouble in his family? Well that is your choice. All I can tell you is let sleeping dogs lie.
Muputa zambiri, zitayeni.
Big Man Wamkulu.