Raised by my father

Most members of society believe that girls who are raised by a single parent – especially a father – do not turn out well. Towera Singini is an exceptional case. She shares her story with Mwereti Kanjo.

When she was only 12 years old, Towera lost her mother after a short illness. It was not easy for her because she was at an age when a daughter needs the guidance of a mother. Her mother was her best friend.

 “During the first 12 years of my life, I was very close to my mum. She was the one person I was fond of and always around. At such a tender age, I had never felt for anyone what I felt for her.”

 Her mother’s death really left a big gap in her life. She got very lonely and sad during the first days.

 Despite getting feminine advice from her sister, and other female relations, she felt it wasn’t the same as getting it from her mother. Luckily, her father quickly stepped in.

 Her father made growing up much easier. She has realised that if he had not been strong for her and her siblings, life would have been different and tougher.

 “My dad made everything so much easier. I have told my friends several times that if my dad had been any different, life wouldn’t be what it has been. We are very close. Not a day goes by when we do not talk or text. He talks to me about some of the things going on in his life and I talk to him about mine. He is loving, caring and understanding.”

 She has a lot of pleasant memories about growing up with her father. The one that stands out is when her father used to take her with her siblings for a drive every Saturday morning.

Towera is today financially comfortable and independent of her father. She is working with Pharmacare in Mzuzu while studying accounting with PAEC.

“My dad has taught me to be independent and never to be comfortable with being dependent on anyone, not even him. I am working my way up and I hope one day he gets to see me at the top and the fact that he believes in me makes everything so much worthwhile.”

She believes her father’s influence academically is what has shaped her career today. He is her friend, father, and mentor.

She was quick to point out that her father disciplined her and her siblings just like any other parent does.

“My dad would not have been as great if he had not disciplined us. I guess that is what makes him a good parent,” said Towera.

Some experts believe that not every daughter that is raised by a single father turn out badly. This is because most fathers pay more attention to the daughter considering that it is their sole responsibility.