Notes From The Gutter

Soccer visa season here again!

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That time of the year again when the televised foreign soccer leagues strike Malawian homes like thunder!

Tomorrow, the English Premier Soccer League kicks off and a few days later, the other foreign competitions get underway.

With this foreign football feasts are awakened patterns and battles that had been shelved for the while the leagues were on a break.

More painful it is for homes that can only access one television channel at a time, and that makes most Malawian homes!

You have a dad who wants a soccer channel, a mother yearning for Nigerian Movies, a son hankering after cartoons and a daughter aching for something else.

In this scenario, you must know of some husbands who make soccer excuses to leave home on the pretext of not wanting to join the fight for television channels. Such hubbies leave home to watch soccer elsewhere.

Such excuses are long branded ‘easy visa-winning proposals’ and you can only guess who the visa granting officers become!

Whether such husbands indeed go to watch soccer, or that the matches indeed run late into the morning of the next day, is a subject for another hour!

You may also know about husbands that, during the off-season, never pay television subscription or attend to any fault to do with matters of the television.

And for the local artist, the foreign leagues, well marketed to the world over as they, are a considerable distraction to local art fiestas.

Now, in the sake of fairness, imagine on a day a big match kicks off at 9 in the evening and the wife, busy combing and finalising her makeovers, says to the husband:

“Hubby, today please take a rest from the trouble of having to endure a cold night out watching soccer — tonight stay home and enjoy all rights to the TV as I watch the Nigerian movies elsewhere!”

Good Republicans, the televised foreign soccer leagues are also a ‘problem’ to other careers.

Ask any honest artist and they will tell you how a big premier league match can ruin a music, drama or poetry show. They are also a sure recipe for local artists’ heartache! .

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