I am a good observer of every day happenings, be it professional, social, family and marital matters. I sometimes marvel at what my eye catches and well, there is little one can do to control certain things. Today, I wish to make this observation about the conduct of some men turned husbands and fathers.
There are these type of men who have to be reminded of their responsibilities in the home and for them to release money for the upkeep of the home, it is like asking them to cross a police roadblock with Indian Hemp in their pockets. The amount of stinginess is as if the money will go towards building a church or feed orphans, when it is their own flesh and blood they are meant to fend for. Even the mere thought of paying school fees sends a pool of sweat on their foreheads as if threatened by an armed robber.
Take a home where the woman is not working and the man goes to work each morning. He leaves no money for food and groceries and will only manage a little to fend for just his breakfast. He returns in the evening with the expectation of a full meal on the table and when he finds it, he is not bothered from where it came from. He ingests without a second thought and expects the same in the days to follow.
This is happening in most homes and the woman dares not infuriate ‘daddy’ with stupid demands of financial support. She will do what she must to fend for him and his children, even prostitute if she may. Should he, therefore, get jealous if he catches her red-handed?
I’m not condoning or encouraging sexual exploration as a money spinner. I am simply questioning the reluctance to provide, yet, expect homely provisions. It’s absurd how these men will eat and ask for more without a care about where the food came from.
There are the responsible type who will provide unconditionally to their families and even be swindled by the very people they are caring for. But the former type, if they do provide will probably be when they are at home on a particular day to take full accountability and stock of what has been bought. Some, even when home, believe it is their right to be provided for because they did a good job of siring children for the woman.
Well, to my sisters who are working tirelessly doing piece works in whatever form to provide for a working husband, I say, wake up. If he doesn’t provide, he must fend for himself then. He is not worthy the name husband or father. Don’t let him get used to the comfort he cannot unleash.
Those of you who provide, God bless you and teach those other types how to be responsible. How do they even sleep without caring about who is proving for their homes, in particular the very food that enables their snores? n