What exactly is conflict?

Conflict means a disagreement between two or more people that leads to power struggle or personality clash. There is a difference between a disagreement and conflict. Disagreement is normal and natural in the development of any relationship, more especially marriage, but conflict is not.

Naturally, the husband and wife are different from each other with regards to the way God made them. As a result of the differences, they are bound to disagree from time to time. Conflict is also as we have seen in the previous articles sometimes a result of selfishness.

The following are some of the ways selfishness manifests itself in the home:

1. Unfaithfulness, including sexual infidelity.

2. Valuing personal ambition and goals above your relationship with your spouse.

3. Lack of accountability, telling lies and being deceptive.

4. Uncaring attitude and lack of support.

5. Closeness to your extended family members at the expense of being close to your spouse.

6. Failure to provide enough financial support when one is able to do so, being unfair to your spouse and uneven distribution of family resources.

7. Not being able to see your marriage as a partnership but as a master-slave relationship.

8. Not being able to see your marriage as a God given assignment to lift up your spouse but a chance to exploit your spouse.

The Bible says in the book of Philippians 2:3-4: let nothing be done through strife or vainly, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Look not every man on his own thing, but every man also on the things of others.