Wife cheating on me with church friend

Dear BMW,

I was privileged to come across your number on Opera. I have a concern I would like to share and seek advice.

I am a family man and my problem is about my wife. I warned my wife against a certain member of our church whom she had been sharing messages and photos on WhatsApp late at night. Four months down the line after she apologised, I caught her texting him again.

At first when I asked who it was she was talking to on phone having mentioned my name in their conversation in a rare circumstance. She said she didn’t know who it was. But when I grabbed the phone and called back, I discovered it was the idiot again.

My wife has a problem of not picking calls when I am around or just remaining watching TV in the living room at night when I retire to bed. The guy, after a heated confrontation, confessed being in a sexual affair with my wife. She, too, broke down and confessed everything; how many times they met and what they did.

Honestly, I am tired of her cheating. I feel divorce is the solution to our problems. I work miles away from home and this keeps me away for 14 days a month and I know when I am away this evil man will keep enjoying my wife.

I want to forgive her, but if I do, will she change?

Mr. Cheated, via WhatsApp, Blantyre

Dearest Mr. Cheated,

First, I can tell that your wife is a novice in the game of cheating, which is why she was caught after just four months. If you ask me, real players don’t get caught, and when they do, they deny it. This very first reason is enough to make you think, aaah may be there is some hope here.

Second, your wife did just fine when said she did not know who the guy she was talking to. No man wants competition in their lives, especially when it comes to women. She did not want to cause you heartbreak or make you look over your shoulder when you travel away from home for 14 days.

Third, of course your marriage will never be the same, now that you know someone was pounding your wife’s yam, what did you expect? If I were you, this is the time I would do anything to save my marriage. Do some soul searching. Find out why she is cheating and move on to ‘build better’.

Why should you be the one to save the marriage, you might ask? Well, what did you expect your woman to do when you are half a month away from her and when you come back you pay very little attention to her.

Let’s be frank here, your woman needs love and the man you call ‘the idiot’ was serving it to her in large dishes. So save your bald head, take some loan from the nearest office bank and spoil the woman. In these Covid-19 times, I don’t expect you to have money. Borrow and lavish her.

Then take her out for a week and do what real men do to their women to erase the other man from her memory. Then make sure you buy her some expensive shoes and wigs. I hear our women love Brazilian hair. Do that.

I am sure by the time you go back home, she will have deleted the other man’s number in her phone; he will be past tense.

But above all, to save your marriage, stop touching your woman’s phone!

Kupepela eti!

Big Man Wamkulu